Archive for the ‘Louis’ Category

Jesus Believed in a Well Regulated Market.

Tony Perkins thinks that Jesus was a Free Market kind of guy and that he would not have been behind Occupy.

I want to point out that Jesus definitely liked a well regulated market.

In fact, Jesus felt that immoral commercial activity should be punished with force.  The cleansing of the temple was pretty much the only time Jesus got mean with people.  DOJ can’t manage to pull that off.

What happened to the world?

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E Pluribus Unum

From 1782 until 1956, the national motto of these great United States was a short telling phrase, “E Pluribus Unum.”  This was our de facto national motto, not declared by legislation, for 174 years.  It had, however, been adopted by congress as an element of the national seal.  Why did the United States switch to “In God We Trust?”

Whatever the reason, the Republican controlled House of Representatives recently took a momentary break from their deadlock to re-affirm our motto.  Why, you ask?  According to a recent Washington Post article about this, it seems like the Democrats have been throwing the good old “E Pluribus Unum” around a little too much.  Why is this a legislation-worthy problem?

Think of the difference between these two phrases.  ”E Pluribus Unum” represents a few ideas that are contrary to the white-washed, Jesus-ed up view of the world that the Republicans are pushing.  First, it says about the USA that we should be one, regardless of spirituality, culture, or economic stature.  Congress does not want this.  They want us to be Christians, regardless of our current faith.  In fact, the big argument going on recently in the Republican primary has been who is Christian enough.  The apparent standard of what qualifies as Christian is very dumb.  Even a Mormon candidate may not be Christian enough for the party.

Now, what does “In God We Trust” say about us?  First of all, it says that our leaders are not comfortable recognizing the large number of Americans who do not trust in God.  They don’t want anything to do with those of us who believe in Allah, who do not believe Jesus was the son of God, or who don’t believe in religion at all.  They don’t want unity.  They don’t want to legitimize alternatives.

“E Pluribus Unum” also represents a cultural unity that much of America has yearned for since the founding.  I don’t need to point to many racist moments in the recent Republican dialogue to show that this is not the Republican plan either.  Let us take a moment to ponder what Republican Candidate Herman Cain was going for with his recent call to put up an electrified fence between the USA and Mexico.  What could he have wanted out of that?  I don’t think it is cultural unity.  Rick Perry can have a racist comment on a rock at his old hunting lodge painted over, but he can’t get it out of my mind that he, and the Republicans, want America to remain as culturally divided as it has been for centuries.  (Please do not take this as a suggestion that Democrats don’t have racist motives as well.)

“In God We Trust” definitely contemplates this God, and not this God.  The motto was originally adopted in 1956 by the same (Democratically controlled) congress that opposed language banning racial discrimination in drafts of the Civil Rights Act just a year later.  I won’t say that adopting the new Motto in 1956 was an intentional act of racism, nor will I say that about the recent move to reaffirm it, but I do think it represents a turn away from the more culturally unifying message of “E Pluribus Unum.”

What else does E Pluribus Unum say about America?  I look to this motto and I see America’s knack for coming together to pull ourselves out of bad times and into good ones.  Before World War II, when things were looking down almost as much as they are right now, America got together and did something about it.  The New Deal and our commitment to saving Europe from Fascism and mass genocide got us out of it.  Just as the current Congress doesn’t want to spend any money solving the problem, the House of Representatives of the early part of the century did not want to embark on the economy saving initiatives in the New Deal.  Roosevelt had to take it to the people.  The people got on Congress’s back, and we pulled them kicking and screaming back into the reality we all lived in.  Today’s Congress wants you to look to god for financial salvation because it will distract you from the fact that it is their problem to solve.  They are the vessel that we should place our trust in.  They are failing their job.

In affirming “In God We Trust,” Republicans and Democrats want you to forget that we can come together to solve our problems.  The government spending before and during World War II that got us out of the depression was the product of America rattling the cage, demanding jobs, and getting them.  The American people built the highways businesses still use, they built the bridges that connect us, and they built the war machines that destroyed the fascist forces in Europe that wanted to rid the European continent of alternative lifestyles.  ”In God We Trust” gives many people legitimacy in thinking that they can solve their own problems through prayer without contemplating the problems of another.  It gives people legitimacy in thinking that their personal relationship with God will save them from poverty and sickness, not their relationship with the body politic.

I am very disappointed that the House took 35 minutes to debate this.

Most disturbingly, many of them actually believe they were sent there by the grace of god.  As far as I can tell, the Motto stands to legitimize this insane megalomaniacal thought.  If we are trusting in God, and God sent them there, then clearly America needs whatever they are selling to you.

We don’t need them.  We need each other.  I encourage you to vote for a challenger in 2012.

 

 

 

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Denmark? I Copen-Hated It.

Last week I went to Copenhagen.  Copenhagen is a great city, but I had a horrible day. This is the story.

The day started with the loose plan to go to Copenhagen.  A few friends had planned to leave for Denmark at about 10am.  When I woke up at the crack of noon, I got into contact with good old Sean Acton and we struck a plan to get there soon-ish to meet up with said friends.  We had been out the night before so we were exhausted and moving slowly.  By the time we showered, found our buddy Jason, got coffee and food, and made our way to the train station, we missed the train.  We had to wait for about half an hour.  It was arguably my fault.  Sean pronounced loudly, “Louis, you’re ruining my vacation.”  In retrospect, this was the beginning of a long day of follies resulting from my decision to travel to Copenhagen.

Americans 0, Copenhagen 1.

The train is beautiful here.  It moves.  It moves fast.  The culture of the train is great.  You can drink on it.  The view is great.  It takes you around the whole Oresund; the body of water separating Sweden from Denmark.  From the train, a large wind farm is visible.  It really is incredible how much wind power there is here.  I don’t even think it is a very windy place, but clearly the country is invested in the future.  Who can blame them?

When we arrived in Copenhagen, a short period of confusion commenced.  We didn’t know where we were.  We couldn’t find any wi-fi, so we couldn’t get a map.  We wandered a bit, and Sean decided to get some cash converted in to Danish Kronor. As the result of a conversation yesterday, it was decided that it made more sense to refer to the Danish Bucks as “Dickies” after the currency abbreviation “DKK.”  More funny is the slang for the Swedish Krona.  From “SEK” we get “Sexies.”  No matter what you call them, Sean got fucked on the transfer.  A 12% fee is way too much.

Americans 0, Copenhagen 2

We walked along these large ponds for a while, moving sort of toward what looked like the city center.  People were jogging.  It was picturesque.  This was one of the points where I should have taken a picture.  Alas, I did not. Eventually, we were made aware that we were going in the right direction by a very conspicuous bus.

Americans 1, Copenhagen 2

We walked around a bit and found the university.  Jason, Sean, and I got into contact with our friends and found out that they were hanging out at Tivoli, the historic amusement park in Copenhagen.  We walked in that direction and stopped for a beer in a nice square with a fountain.  There was a guy on the fountain wearing an American flag as a cape.  This became the topic of conversation briefly.  We were not sure what he was doing.  In fact, we were a little offended at first.  Who would do that?  I’m not going to wear a Danish flag like I conquered Denmark or something.  As it stood, Denmark had conquered me a little bit so far, so it hurt just that much more.

Plus one for Copenhagen?

As it turned out, the flag was actually a US flag with Michael Jackson on it.  The guy in the flag was wearing a “Who’s Bad?” shirt while attempting to Moonwalk.  He was running some sort of sit in/memorial for Mikey, so we were supportive of that.

Americans 2, Copenhagen 2.

The next 2 hours were spent meeting up with our friends, walking around looking for a coat for me, or drinking beer outside.  I didn’t find a coat, but I felt warm.  Eventually we got hungry, and decided eating was a great idea.  I was very excited about this restaurant we had seen that looked like a cross between a good old midwest style Chinese buffet and a Blade Runner set.  Little did we know…

We entered the Shanghai feeling less than convinced.  The servers weren’t very cordial, and we sat down at a random table.  I jumped the gun by getting a plate of food.  As I began to eat my duck in whatever kind of goopy sauce, the man in charge came over and asked us what we wanted to drink.  Despite an incredible language barrier, the man managed to get across to us that a glass of tap water was 16 Dickies, or about 3 dollars and change.  When we expressed that we didn’t want any drinks if it cost money, he expressed that it was 20 Dickies, about 4 dollars and change, to not get a drink.  This was clearly bullshit, but the man told us to check the menu.  At the perfect moment, Sean turns to me and says, “Louis, you’re ruining my vacation!”

Americans 2, Copenhagen 3

Without exaggerating, the reaction we got from the man was something like, “Gotcha Bitch!”  After stifling the sort of “holy shit” response that we were all feeling, we managed to all order water.  Across the table, a girl named Bevin looked like she had just accidentally wandered into a Singapore prison only to find out that it would be 3 dollars for some tap water, but 4 dollars not to get tortured.  We all felt that way too, but as far as I could tell, only Bevin expressed the emotion as accurately.

In return for this man’s shitty deal, I planned to get a fourth plate of food at the end of my dinner and eat only part of it.  Somewhere around my third plate I began to get full.  Chinese buffet has a way of doing that.  So, I decided to leave the leftovers I had currently.  I’m not sure who, maybe Pete the Hipster, but someone brought to my attention at that point that there was another notice posted that I should have read sooner.  This place charges people double if they take too much food and don’t finish it.  The passive aggression was palpable.

This says it costs double, even if you can’t tell.

Americans 2, Copenhagen 4

On our way out of this shitty restaurant, a few employees were standing at the door discussing something very animatedly.  It was clear that the female employee was upset and the male employee was seeing the humor in something.  We weren’t sure what that was.  We collected outside the exit to recap what had just happened.  At some point, one of us noticed that there was a dead bird right by the entrance to the Shanghai, and it was pretty fresh looking.

Americans 2, Copenhagen 5

It was a big loss for America.  We took the train home.  On the way, we saw a sinking ship in the Oresund.  How symbolic.

 

 

 

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Oh Say Can You See, When the Sun Rises at 2AM?

While in Sweden, I have gotten used to a certain level of Beauty.  There are buildings that look like castles.  It’s a little over the top.

This is one of the main school buildings.  They call it the King’s building because the King rode his horse up to that turret once.  No Big Deal.

The gardening here is pretty incredible.  People just love the environment.  It seems like a point of national pride that they treat the earth so nicely.

Most of the streets are cobblestone.  I’m sure they have to repave less often than we do in Ohio.

This is Lunds Universitet Juridicum’s mock court room.  Check out the balls on that gavel!

There are also some things that aren’t as old world that just boggle the mind.

At the local library on the day I arrived, there was a skateboarder – graffiti artist – hip hop party going on.  This is far better treatment than the skaters in my town ever got.  I have to give this little city kudos.

This is the roof deck on the top of the building I live in.  The ocean is about 2 miles away in the direction the camera is pointing.  There was some debate about whether we could see it or not.

They have a very cool way of making all the trees look the same.  It seems like they basically cut all of the trees to the same height and then whether the trees are young or old, they all look the same.  If you look closely, the cross walk is made not by painting over the road, but by placing white marble cobblestones into the road.  I was joking that they must have invented the crosswalk centuries ago, but I think cobblestones don’t last all that long.

 

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Land of the Swedes, Home of the Ikea

My trip began in Boston.  I got on a plane that had been delayed 4 hours at Logan with my buddy Sean Acton, and I flew to Reykjavik in Iceland.  The Icelandic airport was very weird.  First off, the Iron Maiden international tour airplane had landed there.  It looked like quite the party plane.  The airport in Reykjavik was pretty weird.  The plane full of people that I landed with were roughly the only people there.  The airline had failed to give us our boarding passes for the second flight before the first flight, so we were made to stand in line for a while to get them.  It all seemed a little poorly run, especially customs.  When I handed over my passport and said “Hello, how are you?” the guy just gave me a very tired look and stamped my passport.  Meanwhile, I was also tired.  This is why I failed to take a picture of the building.  It was a very futuristic building.

When I landed in Copenhagen, Sean and I ran into two other Suffolk students who were similarly headed to Lund, Sweden. There were countless hilarious language moments along the way.  Here are a few.

WunderWear

WUNDERWEAR!

Notice the “WTF!”

Bringing some Western “Culture” to Lund.

 

Hanging out at the Vag Station.  No Big Deal.

The Swedes love everything American.

They failed to see why this photo was humorous, and actually got a little mad about it.

Utfart, Obvi.

By the time I arrived at our dorm, Spoletorp, I was exhausted.  A peppy Swede by the name of Sanna greeted us and did her best not to lecture us while giving us instructions on our stay here.  I unpacked briefly in my Ikea commercial of a dorm room, but not for long.  We had a bar event that night, so I went.  Fun was had by all in a very nice english style sports bar called “Glorias.”  I never thought I would enjoy 3.5% ABV Guinness, but it hit the spot.

More on Swedish alcohol laws later.  It deserves its own post as it has largely governed the dynamic of the trip so far. Overall, this has been very fun.  I have hung out mostly at the law school and at Spoletorp for the last few days.  As I get more cultured here, I will update further.

SKOAL!

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Ask Not

“Any man’s death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind, and therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee.”

Great words.

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This Is Why America Is Stupid.

The news is blowing up right now about radioactive water seepage in Japan.

Americans think that this is a huge deal when it happens in Japan.

Fox is like holy shit

CNN is like OMG

But then people shrug it off as liberal rant when a news source talks about how the oil and gas industry might be doing the same thing…

just cause it is the New York Times.

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Get It ON Suffolk!

I am rooting so hard for Suffolk this next week.  You should too.  It is such a great place to be.

I just learned that next week the American Bar Association/Association of American Law Schools Site Team will be visiting Suffolk to work on accreditation.  I also just learned that they will be visiting classrooms to see how good the in class discussion is.  It is crazy that I heard this on the same day that our wonderful Dean Nelson sent out an email explaining why we were ranked the way that we were in the U.S. News Law School Rankings.

Dean Nelson basically said that we were ranked that way (listed alphabetically below the 145th school) because of factors that are essential to what actually makes our school good.  Our size, our commitment to access as established by our long standing night school, and the exceptional regional legal market saturation our graduates have accomplished can actually work against us.  I don’t feel positive about the the metric that U.S. News uses, but it’s cool, cause Suffolk students love Suffolk.  The legal market might be looking up pretty soon here, and the student body has changed a lot for the better in recent years. We are probably going to be fine with or without U.S. News’ help.  I agree with Dean Nelson that it is very exciting to be at Suffolk these days.

There is a metric, on the other hand, that we should all care about.  All academies of higher learning, and especially law schools, need to be accredited.  Law Schools go through a special process.  Unlike undergraduate colleges which are accredited by one of many possible accreditation associations, law schools are accredited by two groups working in tendem; the American Bar Association and the Association of American Law Schools.

Why should you care about this?  Why is it significant that they will be coming into classes?  You should care because they are judging your school by a metric that does matter.  Virtually every state requires that you get an ABA accredited school to educate you before letting you sit for the bar.  It is a huge deal that these people are coming into classes next week because if you sound like an idiot in class, or the entire class is acting like they came to law school to avoid questions from the professor, it could have a negative impact on a vital process that our school goes through every so often.

So read up this week.  Be prepared in class.  Dress nicely.  Don’t swear in the lobby.  Do something exceptional in front of any random strangers you may see in the building next week.  Do it so that we stand out a little.  We are being judged on whether our collective personal quality is of a level such that we deserve to call ourselves lawyers.  Do not let yourself slack just because there is a week between memo time and the race to finals.  Be the exceptional people that we all know we are next week.  Get inspired by the love of academia that brought you to Law School.

Suffolk Love!

 

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Awesome Facebook Moment

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Date A Girl Who Plays Video Games

Date a girl who plays video games.

You will find her at the local game exchange weighing whether to spend the next six months of her life re-exploring the childish games of the Nintendo 64 or devouring the substance of the original PlayStation cannon.  She will intimidate you with her harajuku style and her vaguely understood feminist ideals.  She will forgive you for being a little bit of a jerk, because she is fully capable of talking shit right back at you.

You will bond over the only new and truly developing forms of literature; Twitter, comic books, and narrative blogs.  She will criticize your own blog/Twitter feed, but she will read it religiously.  She will make fun of you publicly in the comments to your posts.  You will get into poke fights on Facebook.  It will turn into an eternal poke war with battles and respites of varying length.

Tell her that her exclusive love for the Final Fantasy games from FF7 and onward makes it clear that she is a girl.  Agree with her when she tells you that you are sexist.  Somewhere down there, you both realize that “like a girl” is a common turn of phrase used to indicate either disrespect for a bad gamer or serious and deep affection depending on context.  Your context will always be one of the deepest affection.   Force her to play Modern Warfare so that she will be shrewd, cold, and motivated when the zombies come for you.  When she beats you, she will call you a girl.

Lie to her.  Lie about where you are on the map in a game of Golden Eye.  Knock the controller out of her hands.  Play dirty.  She will rarely need your help to win.

Lose a fair amount.  Don’t do it on purpose.  Only do it when she legitimately wins or when you can’t deny yourself a view of her face exhibiting true elation and pride.  Always expect her to try her hardest to beat you.  Treat her like an equal.  She carries around her video skills as a badge of honor.  Massage her ego, no mater how precocious.

You will propose over World of Warcraft right after you complete a quest, but only if she doesn’t first.  You will have to do this because you’ll be playing together while you are both dicking around at work, and the elation of victory will overcome you. Again, you won’t be able to help yourself.  She would rather have a “Quick Strike Ring” than a diamond ring any day.  Give her both.

Date a girl who plays video games because she is fully aware of the difference between reality and fiction.  Unlike the girl who reads and the girl who does not, the girl who plays video games is stuck in neither reality nor fiction.  She changes her expectations based on which universe she inhabits at any given moment.  Your punishment for failure in either realm will be the expectation that you apologize if what you did really sucked and that you try again.  You might not have infinite lives, but she will never deny you a well deserved 1-UP.

Most importantly, date a girl who plays video games because she understands the value of loss as compared to the value of triumph.  She can square these two ideas in her head.  She can look at her life from many angles.  She can see an epic win on the horizon at any time, no matter how many times she fails.

 

This post in response to This and This.

 

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